One measure of a great person is the legacy they leave behind. A person who positively impacted many people in their family and others they came in contact with is someone who had a rich and valuable life. These people should be emulated and their memory treasured. These are comments normally made about someone who passed away. However, what we do while we are still around determines what will be said afterward, and this is a situation you can always do something about.
Perseverance and hard work are admirable traits we want our children to emulate. More important is to live your life in a way that is a model for your children (and everyone else you interact with). Big things become obvious and possibly ingrained in thoughts about us. Many times, it’s the less obvious things that will make a difference. Total honesty. Never lying. Following through on promises, and in a professional setting, promised due dates. Trying to pass on what you know by mentoring younger people. Never trying to get away with something that you easily could– but that isn’t completely open or truthful.
One example that comes to my mind that had a big impression on my sons was one time when I got a dinner check and called over the waiter to tell him he had left off one of the dinner entrees. I found out much later that that made a big impression on them. I never gave it a second thought.
I’ll also mention something that had a big impact on my impression of a student. I had each student give a 5-minute executive summary presentation of their term project, and they were all great. I noticed one of the students reading and sending texts or messages and not giving the proper attention or respect to the other students who were presenting, which discouraged me from recommending her for a position at Withum. Withum has a team spirit and a culture built on integrity, inclusion and collaboration. Giving respect to other’s work is vital to maintaining a productive and collaborative environment, which the student’s impression did not demonstrate. See, everything is important.
There was an incident in the movie Gran Torino where Clint Eastwood plays a recently widowed, bigoted, angry old man and sees a woman’s groceries fall from a ripped bag. The local boys pretty much ignored her, but the Asian immigrant boy who lived next door to him stopped to help her. That single act of kindness completely changed his impression of that boy and his family and led to a touching relationship with them.
We need to do the best we can and live our lives like mensches (a Yiddish word that refers to someone who is honorable, decent and always does the right thing). We could also follow the Golden Rule – Do unto others as you would others do unto you. Or, in the words of Pope Francis, “Be Nice.”
As we prepare for a New Year, make it a new year of making your life a Blessing.
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